I love the questions I get from my husband when our daughter is sick.
Him: Oh my God, she's burning up. Did you know that?
What I wish I said: Nice detective work, Sherlock. Remember, I am the one who called you at work three hours ago and told you that she had a 102 fever? Oh, and in the course of her crying and clinging to me all afternoon, I was somehow tipped off to her high temperature.
What I actually said: Yeah, I noticed that.
Him: Did you give her medicine?
What I wish I said: No. No I did not. In the time since you left for work this morning I have become a Christian Scientist. So, no, I did not give our feverish, miserable, whining two year old any medicine. She can tough it out.
What I actually said: Um, yeah.
God love him...